｢若是能行，總要盡力與眾人和睦。｣ 羅馬書 12:18
"If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men." Romans 12:18
以下對話節錄自蓋比的日記：(中翻英)
The following is adapted from Grumpy's diary: (Chinese-English translation)
咖啡茶棧小對話
A Quaint Dialogue in Cafe
我：「歡迎光臨~飲料、咖啡、冰沙全面75折喔!」
I: Welcome to CET, coffee, slurpee, all beverages 25% off!
老外：「請問你們店裡的招牌是什麼?」
Gaijin (bossy): Wat's ur dam' specialty'n here?
我：「我推薦我們的咖啡還有奶茶或是新鮮現搾的西瓜汁。」
I: Ground coffee, milk tea, and freshly-squeezed watermelon juice are highly recommanded.
老外：「那你們的奶茶是用奶精還是用牛奶做的呢?」
G (picky and pricky): And the creame is made of chemi-powder sht or natural milk?
我：「我們有分一般奶精調製的奶茶跟用鮮奶調成的鮮奶茶。」
I: We've creamed milk tea and milk tea with fresh milk.
老外：「那我要一杯鮮奶茶。」
G: The latter, please.
我：「甜度跟冰塊呢?」
I: On the rocks and with sugar?
老外：「半糖….呃我想還是三分好了，冰塊去冰，然後幫我加珍珠。我另外再買一杯大杯拿鐵。」
G: Half sugar... well, 33.34% sweetened is exactly fine, no ice, with pearl. And another latte to go.
我：「請問您要熱的還是冰的?」
I: Hot or iced?
老外：「室溫就好。」
G (restless): Luke.
我：「那您的拿鐵要封口嗎?還是幫您蓋杯蓋就好?」
I: (OS: So, r u fkn saint or else?) So, thermo-sealed or simply lid-on?
老外：「幫我封口好了。」
G: Sealed please.
我：「好的，打完折後總共 98 元。」
I: OK, and the discount total will be 98.
老外：「抱歉，我只有大鈔。」
G: I've got only thousand-dollar bill, sorry about that.
我：「沒關係，收您一千……找您的 902 元還有發票，稍候一下喔！」
I: That's OK, here's 902 change and receipt, a moment please.
老外：「啊靠北，我要打統一編號。」
G: Oh, sht, I need my Tinp No. on it...
我：「…好的，沒問題，您的編號是?」 我勉強擠出笑容，心中幹譙著：「死老外毛真多，我還要作廢一張發票真麻煩！待會兒拉花就拉一坨屎給你!」
I (irate): No problemo, and the number is? A reluctant chuckle emerged to guise my fury over these fkn fussy furries for tiring invoice adjs... (OS: Why not go eat my sht as the fanciest rosseta?)
老外：「你們的促銷活動到什麼時候?」
G: When is the promo ended?
我：「我們將持續到6月底。」
I: Till end June.
做完，如願地「拉了一坨屎」在拿鐵裡。
As a genie in the lamp, I conjured up a brand new flavor 'Cafe au Ordure' for the fkn wessi.
我：「謝謝喔，歡迎下次再來。」
I: Thank you, Sir. Hope to see you soon!
【翻飛燕】
蓋比中翻英，蓋妞英翻中；
翻來又翻去，翔窺卅七房。
"If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men." Romans 12:18
以下對話節錄自蓋比的日記：(中翻英)
The following is adapted from Grumpy's diary: (Chinese-English translation)
咖啡茶棧小對話
A Quaint Dialogue in Cafe
我：「歡迎光臨~飲料、咖啡、冰沙全面75折喔!」
I: Welcome to CET, coffee, slurpee, all beverages 25% off!
老外：「請問你們店裡的招牌是什麼?」
Gaijin (bossy): Wat's ur dam' specialty'n here?
我：「我推薦我們的咖啡還有奶茶或是新鮮現搾的西瓜汁。」
I: Ground coffee, milk tea, and freshly-squeezed watermelon juice are highly recommanded.
老外：「那你們的奶茶是用奶精還是用牛奶做的呢?」
G (picky and pricky): And the creame is made of chemi-powder sht or natural milk?
我：「我們有分一般奶精調製的奶茶跟用鮮奶調成的鮮奶茶。」
I: We've creamed milk tea and milk tea with fresh milk.
老外：「那我要一杯鮮奶茶。」
G: The latter, please.
我：「甜度跟冰塊呢?」
I: On the rocks and with sugar?
老外：「半糖….呃我想還是三分好了，冰塊去冰，然後幫我加珍珠。我另外再買一杯大杯拿鐵。」
G: Half sugar... well, 33.34% sweetened is exactly fine, no ice, with pearl. And another latte to go.
我：「請問您要熱的還是冰的?」
I: Hot or iced?
老外：「室溫就好。」
G (restless): Luke.
我：「那您的拿鐵要封口嗎?還是幫您蓋杯蓋就好?」
I: (OS: So, r u fkn saint or else?) So, thermo-sealed or simply lid-on?
老外：「幫我封口好了。」
G: Sealed please.
我：「好的，打完折後總共 98 元。」
I: OK, and the discount total will be 98.
老外：「抱歉，我只有大鈔。」
G: I've got only thousand-dollar bill, sorry about that.
我：「沒關係，收您一千……找您的 902 元還有發票，稍候一下喔！」
I: That's OK, here's 902 change and receipt, a moment please.
老外：「啊靠北，我要打統一編號。」
G: Oh, sht, I need my Tinp No. on it...
我：「…好的，沒問題，您的編號是?」 我勉強擠出笑容，心中幹譙著：「死老外毛真多，我還要作廢一張發票真麻煩！待會兒拉花就拉一坨屎給你!」
I (irate): No problemo, and the number is? A reluctant chuckle emerged to guise my fury over these fkn fussy furries for tiring invoice adjs... (OS: Why not go eat my sht as the fanciest rosseta?)
老外：「你們的促銷活動到什麼時候?」
G: When is the promo ended?
我：「我們將持續到6月底。」
I: Till end June.
做完，如願地「拉了一坨屎」在拿鐵裡。
As a genie in the lamp, I conjured up a brand new flavor 'Cafe au Ordure' for the fkn wessi.
我：「謝謝喔，歡迎下次再來。」
I: Thank you, Sir. Hope to see you soon!
【翻飛燕】
蓋比中翻英，蓋妞英翻中；
翻來又翻去，翔窺卅七房。
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